We were stopped by a traffic light directly across from the Crossfire, and my gaze was immediately drawn to the black Bentley sitting in front of it. The eclectic mix of New York was heaven to me, stirring an excitement that made me feel more vibrant here than anyplace else I'd ever lived. Ladies in haute couture and five-hundred-dollar shoes teetered past steaming hot dog vendor carts and shouting hawkers. Men in business suits walked alongside women in flowing skirts and flip-flops. I people- watched shamelessly, my eyes skimming over everyone and everything. The city was thrumming around us, taxis and people surging through the growing heat and humidity as they crammed what they could into the insufficient hours of the day.
Things were going well in my world as Megumi and I headed back from lunch.įorty minutes of gossip, guy-ogling, and three awesome carne asada tacos later, I was feeling pretty good.Īnd we were returning to work a little over ten minutes early, which I was glad for since I hadn't been the most punctual employee lately, even though Mark never complained. "I know a great place a couple blocks up. "Well, if the opportunity presents itself, I'm certainly not opposed. The moment things started going too well, Cary sabotaged them. He was so easy to love, which led to a lot of broken hearts because he couldn't love back the same way. I'd learned the hard way never to set up an acquaintance or friend with Cary. Is he single? Wanna hook me up?" Turning my head quickly, I hid a wince. Not that Cary couldn't also be appreciative of a hot guy, but nothing beat girl talk.īumping shoulders with me to show she was teasing, she said, "How about that roommate of yours? From the photos I saw, he's gorgeous, too. It was good to hang out with another girl. I can't help but wonder what it'd be like to hook up with a guy whose body screams sex like that. So are extremely hot men like Gideon Cross. "So it's not serious?" "I didn't say that." "Don't believe everything you read on those gossip blogs." "So I thought maybe you'd known him before." "I read that it was serious between you two," she went on when I joined her outside on the sidewalk. Megumi pushed through the revolving lobby door. Would we have had the same visceral reaction to each other from a distance as we'd had up close in the Crossfire lobby? He'd wanted me the moment he saw me on the street.
I wondered what that meeting would have been like - him with a gorgeous brunette on his arm and me with Cary. It was inevitable that Gideon and I would've crossed paths at some point. My mother gave generously to many abused children's charities, as did Gideon. Private tidbits about his life were worth a small fortune.ĭid you know him before you started working here?" "No.Īlthough I suppose we would have met eventually." How thoughts of him consumed me, how the feel of him beneath my hands drove me wild, how the passion of his tortured soul cut into me like the sharpest blade. I wished I could just open the valve and gush about my overwhelming feelings for him. "Things still hot and heavy with you and Gideon Cross?" She glanced at me with a slight smile.Īnd I wished desperately that I could talk about it. It took a couple of deep breaths after I hung up to compose myself enough to join Megumi again. "In the meantime, enjoy lunch with your co-worker. "You can have what you want after work, angel." I had this sick feeling in my gut, like something awful was going to happen. I never again wanted to roll out of a lover's bed feeling worthless and dirty.Īnd I sure as hell didn't want to cheapen what I shared with Gideon just because I was irrationally scared of losing him. Which was why I now insisted on having some sort of friendly framework in place before I went to bed with a man. There'd been a time when I'd turned to sex to feel affection, confusing momentary desire with genuine caring. How did he always know what was going on in my mind? "Yes," I breathed, closing my eyes. If Gideon was lusting after me, he couldn't be lusting after anyone else. I sagged into the column, admitting to myself that I'd fallen into an old destructive habit - I'd exploited sexual attraction to ease my insecurities.
Now, with me, it was about pleasure and love.īecause I treasure you, Eva, and what we have.Įven our driving urge to f**k each other constantly is precious to me, because it matters." Only I knew what it meant for Gideon to view a sexual act as a gift.įor him, sex had previously been about pain and degradation or lust and necessity. I lifted my face to the tinted dome in the ceiling that concealed the nearest security camera.